Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Rest Of America Don't Mean Jack Shit -- You In Mississippi Now

How terrible it is to be oppressed:
A conservative group is threatening to sue the Secret Service for religious discrimination over security guidelines that would ban Christian crosses from President Bush's inaugural parade route.


The directive also prohibited folding chairs, bicycles and other structures, and displays "such as puppets, papier mache objects, coffins, crates, crosses, theaters, cages and statues."

"The way it's written, it's an unequivocal ban on crosses," said the Rev. Patrick J. Mahoney of the Christian Defense Coalition. The group is seeking to have the prohibition overturned in federal court if the Secret Service fails to retract it.

"They are not banning large displays of the Star of David or Islamic symbols," Mahoney said. "The only resolution is that they would have to pull 'crosses' out. And they could easily protect religious freedom by saying, 'We ban all structures made of wood."'

The Secret Service was working on a clarification Monday to resolve the flap. Spokesman Tom Mazur said the ban on crosses "is strictly in regards to structures -- certainly not the symbol."

"There is no prohibition on crosses, symbols or messages based on content -- only structures made of materials or of a size that could be used in a potentially threatening or harmful manner," Mazur said.

Quite frankly, Fuck You, Rev. Patrick J. Mahoney of the Christian Defense Coalition. Whether you and your fellow superstitious nits want to accept it or not, the inauguration of the President of the U.S. is not supposed to be a religious festival.

On the other hand, this year we are coronating a boy king, a chimp, a man who claims Jesus is his favorite philosopher but who doesn't go to church himself. So, what the hell. Have your damn crosses.

Y'know, they show up better on TV if you light 'em on fire.

Rock on, filkertom!

Y'know, if they'd've said "objects made of wood," there'd've been a thousand 15-foot fiberglas crosses on Ebay for prospective "faithshowing" tomorrow morning....

I am glad I am old. I wish I had not had children. I would leave no hostages to fortune in Bushmurka, if I had the choice again.
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